Trying to retire won’t become a part time job, I hope. I just received a letter of the administration following my demand. The first thing they ask is to send back is my Certificate of Birth. The second, my Certificate of Law School. One could say those 2 items are the bare essentials of a career, but a little late anyway.

My approximately + 40 x 50 cm Law School Certificate doesn’t fit in our standard copy machine, and anyway the copy shop is only at the other side of the bridge. Back home 5 minutes later, I got the fine print (even I read them too late...) of the instructions: it had to be a ‘conform declared copy’. In France, this “procedure” does not exist officially any more, but apparently in Belgium it endures. The difference between a kingdom and a republic ? I doubt it.

Who could be entiteled to declare the copy of this university paper ‘conform’ with the original ? Anyway not the undersigned professors: the dead I can’t ask, and the living, I wouldn’t dare to disturb.

So my next walk was to City Hall. First it seemed as if I put a ghost question from the Middle Ages: “we used to do it, but we don’t any more...”. After consulting collegues the answer was positive: the man at the Fast Counter (Snelloket) will still do it ... Fast Man !

He was all smiling: “this is quite a poster, but do I really have to read all this in the original to compare it to the copy ?”  It’s a joy to find people in public administration with a sense of humor, so I replied “No, but you may add manually ‘Magna Cum Laude’ “ ;-)

I explained him why I needed it, and he smiled, shaking his head and commenting on what you could read in Kafka.

So he duly put 4 stamps, and signed - still laughing - but without adding the Magna Cum Laude. I asked him what the cost was (even without the MCL ;-) and it was ... free !

Next chapter was my certificate of birth. As I already thought, the City Administration where I actually live since decades could not deliver it: only the one of the city of my birth. There is some logic in that, I’m not that stupid or stubborn.

So, I checked the internet site of my home town of 59 years ago, and discovered there, a ‘certificate of birth’ is under the category of ‘Certificate of Living’.  Oddly, I can’t get this where I live, but only where I was born, although I could have died since. Ok, If I retire, I must be alive, otherwise the paper mountain sadly is Anne’s problem... And internet also tells me I have to present my very self personnally to get it. That’s logic: they must physically see you to certify you’ re alive, what proves that .. you once were born. Not bad to start at the end, to prove the beginning. I won’t argue with that logic, I quit (if you already haven’t).

And then, I wondered, ... I finally did it all wrong. Why try to get a Certificate of Law School, if I wasn’t ever born, a fact they prove by my living presence ? To do things in the right order, and not to waste precious energy, I should first try to get the full paper evidence I was (1) ever born and (2) still living, before (3) trying to prove my academic qualifications for (4) a job I fulfilled almost a quarter of a century.

We, jurists, always mix up the right order of things....

Wat u vast niet gemist hebt - Ce que vous n’avez certainement pas râté - You didn’t miss this one did you ?

07 12 2010 “Au Texas, un juge met la peine de mort en proces” (Le Monde, Blog Veilleur de jour)

A quote a day, keeps the doctor away ;-)

“Waren er tegenargumenten die men vergeten had ? Natuurlijk waren die er nog. De logica is weliswaar onwrikbaar, maar tegen een mens die wil leven, kan zij niet op”.

Kafka, Het Proces

Photo of the day:

Fast Counter of the City Hall Administration of Bruges.

Poem of the day:

“En als finaal bewijs van mijn schepping,

ik neem een nieuw oktrooi op de leegte

en stort mij, hoofse liederen zingend, in de hoogte,

mijn toekomst en ontbinding tegemoet”

Paul Snoek, Gedichten, ‘Exegi Monumentum’